The “House Wife” Who is Supposed to be Miserably Unequal, but isn’t.

Question: “Who wears the pants in the relationship?” Response: “Dumb question. We are both equal.”


Typically, this response is expressed by someone who has a job and earns an income.

Recently, however, it has become obvious that people who can stay home are also a part of the response above.

What makes this response odd is the insult and aggression that is woven into it.

Although these individuals are willing to stay home, they choose to find it insulting when someone brings the topic up.



Apparently, I’m supposed to feel like a slave because I literally do the same tasks everyone else must do to survive, except I don’t have to wait until I get off work to do them.

Yeah, I know. Shocking.

My husband and I have recently discovered -based on people’s perception of how our family is run- that he is controlling and locks me in a basement, and I’m incapable of doing anything but cook him dinner and clean his underwear.

We were quite amazed at how these people with whom we aren’t intimately intertwined with and who don’t pay our bills, knew all of this and we were utterly oblivious.

The good news is, I’m not actually a slave…

While I glance at my husband as he switches the clean clothes from the washing machine to the dryer, I have something new to chuckle about.

While he includes me in every financial decision, he often pauses to crack a joke about how “it isn’t my place to have an opinion.”

While he continuously encourages me to take a break from “my slave duties” and go out and do anything I’d like while he watches our daughter, I get to choose to stay in and finish those inhumane chores so that we all can go out together at the end of the day.

Honestly. The list goes on, but…

The greatest news is how well our system works because we aren’t insulted by our prescribed labels.

Lastly, if I’m ever asked the question above…

My response will be that my husband does because I don’t really like wearing clothes, and someone has to wear them to go pick up milk from the grocery store.


But, isn’t it?

“Just because I share something on Social Media doesn’t mean it is about me.”

Numerous times I have logged onto Facebook to read the statement above from various people whom I have met and interacted with at one point in my life.

Without a doubt -in one way or another- we are what we publicly post.

So, what is with all the justifications?

Confrontation often leaves people feeling weak, fearful, and embarrassed.

Often when people are confronted about a situation, they aren’t prepared to admit any fault because it has the potential to leave them vulnerable.

Providing the statement above not only allows people to escape from a certain level of confrontation, but it also gives them the opportunity to prove to others that they aren’t who others claim they are “post” to be.

Even if some people literally post randomly without any supposed connection to what they publicly showcase, the above statement still expresses that they are what they post; it only suggests that they lack value in anything specific, that they just don’t care.

So again, what is with all the justifications?

Are people afraid to be who they are; to love the things they love?

If people publicly share what they don’t care about to hide what they do care about, are they doing so to prevent rejection from others?

Or is what they post (“randomly”) who they really are, but they can’t accept themselves?

Embrace who and what you are.